8/4/2018

I had such a lovely day today that I just had to journal! Yesterday was good too.

Yesterday I came home from UCLA for the weekend and had an appointment with Dr. Bassi. I was venting to her all of the shit that happened with Brendan and all of my frustrations with it. She told me that I really don't know the whole story and what's going on with him. At the very least, two basic options might have happened, he really is ignoring me and if he is then FUCK him I don't need that kind of shit, or something really is going on with him and he feels like not talking to me because of it. Either way, it's out of my control and I can't do anything about it in the meantime. So I'm trying to relax now because of that.
I also told her how I was feeling especially lonely and sad since that happened and she encouraged me to spend more quality time by myself instead of trying to distract myself from my feelings.
Afterward, I bought an acai bowl and sat by the beach for half an hour, just thinking, reflecting and enjoying the weather. I still have more reflecting to do about why I'm feeling so lonely and what my passions are.

Today I spent my morning walking with Dad and Boboy to the Farmer's Market and it was so nice! It was good exercise and we got to buy kale and salsa and try some fruit. We watched this horror movie called Happy Death Day together after lunch which was really fun to watch.
In the afternoon, I went out with Erica and Carrie! We stopped by Nijiya to get snacks and food before our movie and then went to watch Sorry to Bother You which was really.... weird. I get the message it's trying to send and I agree with it but the last act with the horse people was TOO MUCH! All three of us agreed on that. After that, we ate dinner together at Fish Bonz talking about attractive celebrities and other things and then walked around Whole Foods before hanging out by the pool just talking about a bunch of stuff. I LOVE those two so much. They really are my best friends because I feel so comfortable around them talking about anything and they're both just such good friends to me! We talked about future trips together, like Solvang for my birthday and a road trip to Portland and Seattle after Erica graduates. I love them so much and can't wait to hang out with them again next weekend!!!